Life as an Extreme Sport

I Don’t Belong in Feminist Communities

This thread makes me sad, and I’ve made the decision to remove myself from the community, which makes me even sadder. (And I realize that by providing a trackback, I open myself up to debate in the comments, or worse. I’m a big girl, though, and there’s the whole taking responsibility for my words thing – I did it with Chris, and I’ll do it here.)

I guess when it comes right down to it, I don’t belong in feminist communities. There’s a lot of interesting stuff there, but the few things that bother me, bother me enough that I feel very uncomfortable being silent, but speaking up feels discouraged (if not outright told to knock it off – I haven’t been yet, but I’ve seen others). Which, you know, fair – her site and community, and she can run it the way she wants, and this ruminition is larger than just that site. What it is is that I wish it wasn’t such a prevailing attitude through-out the feminist community; I think there’s a lot of interesting dialogue waiting to happen, but it can’t happen if you insist on treating all men the same, or talking in exact black and white terms about men – and then insisting on different treatment for women.

Maybe this comes back to the CHID “indoctrination”for Douglas I’ve received, but I just get deeply uncomfortable to be around a conversation that is leaving out pieces of or simplifying a complicated issue.

I find it deeply amusing that Johnny Cash is singing about standing his ground and not backing down right now. Sticking to your own convictions is sometims a serious bitch to do. But, hah, I know what’s right, even in this world that wants to push me around…

Ahem. Anyhow, as I was saying, a big oh well here. I’ve always called myself an equalist, though, and not a feminist. I think there are serious issues with men, in treatment of women, in attitudes towards themselves, in patriarichal thinking, misogyny, and so forth. But women ain’t perfect, either, and just because they’ve gotten a raw deal in the past doesn’t justify bad behaviour nowWhich I’m not, to be clear, accusing anyone of – merely clarifying my own position here.. There needs to cease being “sides” in this, and everyone needs to work towards treating everyone as equals, period.

Sigh – definitely my CHID background shining through.

Edited: This is a test, January 06, 2007.