Life as an Extreme Sport


Woke up cold today. Not physical, internal/emotional. No real response to anything. Thoughts or mails that generally bring response, smiles and warmth, stir nothing in me. Equally absent are anger, hurt; passion itself, no matter the passion, has left. Even the internal conflict that was chewing at me so badly last night, the stress and nerves, gone.

I don’t know why. I have the vague feeling I should want to cry, but I don’t want to. A vague emptiness, poking the socket where a tooth once was. Maybe the internal conflict pulled me too far, and I shut down? Perhaps it was too much stress, too many nerves at once, and a failsafe triggered?

Maybe I need some physical contact, a real expression that someone cares.

Maybe I’m just tired.

Maybe I just need to talk.