She’s a rose in a lily’s cloak
She can hide her charms
It is her right there will be time
To chase the sun with ribbons undone
My sister and I have achieved an interesting balance of labour around the house – if you can call it balance. She takes care of almost all the domestic things; laundry, cooking, medications, running interference with relatives and family friends. (And does it all while continuing to work 25 hours a week, and study for the MCAT several hours a day.)
Me? My “job” seems to be the role I’ve always had in the family: to be the whimsical, off-beat, entertaining one. I go shopping, and bring back small bits of the outside for Mom. An interesting pattern, new clothes, great finds on shoes, funny stories about what I saw at the mall.
She runs like a fire does
Just picking up daises
Comes in for a landing
A pure flash of lightening
Past alice blue blossoms
You follow her laughter
And then she’ll surprise you
One of the harder things has been the fear. Fear that Mom won’t see the major life events that are coming, for all of us. To see my sister go through medical school, me graduate with my PhD, complete with Harry Potter-esque robes. To see my sister get married, have children, to see my brother get his life together and actually become that amazing human being that’s knocking around in his soul somewhere. To see me publish my first book, go on my first talk show, be interviewed for the news.
Today, that got just a little easier. One of the awesome people I work with updated the staff page, and I was able to show Mom. She’s known about it, of course – working my tail off would be difficult to hide. But knowing and seeing are two such very different things, and she was so happy when she saw. So proud. And I got a little taste, at least, of what I might not otherwise have.
But oh, I hope I have. I hope, I hope, I hope.
I don’t want to grow up Mom at least not tonight