Life as an Extreme Sport

Oscillating Over The Landscape

Saw the Cowboy Junkies today, a free concert at Tower Records in downtown Seattle. It was great fun, and a wonderful show. The Swede and The Fabulous Miss Jenna joined me, and aside from nervously hoping there would be no unpleasent encounters with ‘aliens’, all was well. The band played for about 45 minutes, and then signed autographs, took photographs of and with the crowd, for at least an hour or two.

It was a great, great show.

After this, TFMJ treated The Swede and I to dinner at The Melting Pot – mmmm yummy, fondue! It was a nice, long, overly filling dinner. (And costly – TFMJ is truly fabulous.)

…Rid yourself of all regrets because here is where it all begins…

I can’t say that the day was without its stresses; besides worrying about ‘alien’ encounters at Tower, I heard about him having an out of town guest. A romance interest, a rival to myself (or that’s how I see her, as she was actively pursuing him when he and I were still…) In keeping with the spirit of my conversation with Jenna the other day, I didn’t mind hearing she was here, but I was bothered by the implications. I tried not to talk about it with Jenna too much, but I probably failed a little in that regard.

…hold your breathe it’s about to fall…

I did start down the path of being bothered by her mere presence here (to be fair, I’m not sure I feel safe with her around); jealousy, I think – an odd emotion to experiance! I managed to slap myself back into line relatively quickly (the span of a few minutes) – after all, aren’t I the one with a guest Swede? (Still, she’s in his bed with him. It stabs, it hurts, and I don’t claim to be logical about it.)

…Just outside there waiting just outside the circle waiting there is someone I don’t know who…

Everything lately has been rather odd. Not necessarily in a bad way, but in a “I’ve never been on this road before” sort of way. I find myself walking multiple paths at once, and they are not at all similar. From wanting a future with The Swede to wanting my husband back, to wanting no romantic involvements at all, I find myself oscillating all over the landscape of choice. It’s cliche to say that all that is consistant in my life is inconsistancy, but it’s true – at least when it comes to love and romance.

The rest of it [life] is coming along quite well, even in my hard to please opinion. I do things on a regular basis with a small group of people, and am expanding that group. I’m taking the effort to meet more people; hell, I’ve got a dialogue going with my favourite author! I’m looking into tai chi, ai chi, water colour painting and photography. (Of everything, photography is the strongest pull – the camera does something to/for me, and I love its magical pull.) I’ve been writing again, and some of it is even halfway decent.

Next step: open mic night, somewhere.